|—||Me everytime I drink (via timedoesnotexisthere)|
I don’t wanna be your friend,
I wanna kiss your neck
i’m always going to love this song
everything is awesome // tegan and sara feat. the lonely island
have you heard the news, everyone’s talking
life is good cause everything’s awesome
lost my job, it’s a new opportunity
more free time for my awesome community
I Was Trying To Be Funny But It Came Out as Really Mean: A 5-part documentary starring me.
I Was Trying To Be Loving And Supportive But I Probably Overstepped My Boundaries And Came Off as Creepy: a feature-length film with two sequels and a TV series adaption.
I Was Trying To Tell You I Relate To Your Difficult Situation But It Probably Sounded Like I Was Making It All About Me: a novel saga with several side book adaptions and a movie.
remember when Andy scored among the highest ever on the aptitude test for becoming a police officer but then was denied because the interview showed that he was too kind and trusting and empathetic to be a cop
how to get laid
1. find a couch
2. lay on it
3. i’m so lonely